Lets not beat around the bush and get straight to the point, your cuntary coefficient ( a highly complicated mathematical derivation based on the biological similarity between the average man’s DNA and John Terry’s-ultimate cunt- Newton and I came up with it on our visit to Bolivia) is multiplied by 9.5 the moment you decide to publish an open letter. You’re a dick who probably listens to LL COOLJ while jerking yourself off in front of a mirror, that’s my feeling towards all these cunts who are publishing all kinds of open letters to all different kinds of people. What has anybody ever achieved by writing an open letter? What great things have been achieved by writing an open letter? Can you imagine where we would be if people like Ghandi and Luther-King had just sat there writing open letters instead of going out there and making their (constructive) views heard in an effective manner?
This is the age of the internet-thug, key-board warriors, twitter-heroes who sit behind their computers all day in white underpants with a bowl of cereal on their lap and a 1997 poster of Pamela Anderson on their wall which they jerk off too every night when they are done chucking open letters and insulting people on twitter. If you don’t like somebody’s tweets there’s a very effective tool called an un-follow button, there’s no need to be a cunt about things, I don't want to read about your silly feuds when I log onto my news site to read actual important news.
US President Barack Obama was in Africa last week, admittedly I haven’t the foggiest notation of an idea as to why he was here but what I do know is that his visit cost American tax payers close to a $100 000 000 US. I wasn't able to find out how much it cost South African tax payers but I know if it was President Jacob Zuma who had spent that much on a visit to the US the very same people who were thrilled at President Obama’s visit tweeting all kinds of swear words and demanding tickets to Australia ( which they cannot afford ).
While we are on the topic of foreign presidents and stuff our propensity as South Africans to idolize anything foreign really baffles me, we are so desperate to praise anything foreign we are willing to praise a man who has done nothing for Africa or more specifically South Africa. We are willing to pay R800 or R900 to watch a cold play or Kanye West concert but we won’t pay R10 to see the Parlotones or Proverb. South Africans know more about Adolf Hitler and Stalin then they do about Oliver Tambo and Walter Sisulu. People will laugh at other South Africans for making grammatical errors and having “comrade” accents in English but the very same South Africans find French, Spanish and Portuguese grammatical errors and accents sexy. I like social networks just as much as the next guy they provide a portal in which we can communicate with people we would otherwise never have been able to interact with but at the same time you also can’t ignore the negativity which platforms such as twitter and Facebook spread.
Instead of embracing social networks as a way for our fellow black South Africans to get stuck into the language and learn by interacting with people who are proficient in the language my fellow black people (actually you aren't my people so fuck you) will transform into comedians as soon as a fellow South African makes a grammatical error. Before you make fun of somebody for not being able to speak/write the language properly perhaps you should ask yourself why they aren't
as fluent as you are. You look good to your friends for 5 minutes but you scar the person on the other side of your comedy for life. Where have you ever seen an Afrikaans person make fun of FW De Klerk for his thick Afrikaans accent? How many times have we seen black people make fun of other black people for how they speak?Let’s not forget the other tendency black people have of terming things as “ghetto” what exactly quantifies ghetto? I was called ghetto because I eat porridge in the morning instead of cereal. These people who are going around calling people ghetto (as if living in the ghetto is a choice or an indication of a lack of intellect) and laughing at people’s accents I have a question for you…How many of your parents and grandparents grew up in Sandton or Clifton? Do all your aunts and uncles speak the kind of English that will have the queen of England screaming in orgasmic pleasure? I didn't think so…
